Writing too much

I have run into a productivity problem as of late. I am writing too much. Not that I am producing any finished product, I am unfocused.

I am writing on several projects that have nothing to do with each other and trying to do too much. I started many years ago coming up with concept after concept, bits of dialogue or pages of fiction that were thoughts put to paper.

For a while I would find that this worked well, since I am scattered as is. But as I stopped finish one work after the other, I had all these works that require a focus that I got, well, too lazy to put in. Now I have many products and no conclusive endings ready to rock out.

My girlfriend asked me, the other day, what I was working on. While I was painting a statue I worked on last week and glueing together the pieces for a short film, I was also trying to work on a screenplay, a short story and three separate plays which are almost half complete. But, when asked, I could not tell her what the plot of the plays were. I just couldn't come up with it. If I had I would be done, I figure. But here I sit, nothing done in the last couple of months.

Having the ADD thing is a tough thing. While it allows one to be creative and do a lot of different things, it never allows for complete satisfaction. I end up toiling a lot, doubting even more and never fully satisfied.

I hope I can figure it out soon so I can move on. I have soooo much in the pipeline and I feel like I am running out of time.

Peace.

Another unnecessary death

Staff Sgt. Ryan Maseth died in January in Iraq. He died while trying to take a shower because he was electrocuted by faulty design. He died without a bullet fired...

As you may well know, I was a member of the Reserve and National Guard for almost 12 years. I don't wear the uniform anymore but I did have a job that I needed to know a crapload about the military for. One thing I know is that people in the military are trained fighting machines. They train to do battle, to do things that promote or resupply the battle or to make sure that those outside the battle are kept up.

But when someone dies, and not the first, from a faulty shower, that is absolutely pathetic. As I was reading the article on CNN, I read that Kellogg, Brown and Root, a subsidiary of Halliburton, only fixes problems in Iraq once they have occurred, and is not doing preventive maintenance, I am, I don't know, wanting to vomit pretty hard.

Imagine if you were given a huge blank check and told to go support the mission in Iraq and you failed to the point that you were killing our own servicemen. How would you live with yourself? Would you need to pardon yourself as you blew your nose into crisp $100 bills?

I think this war is a crock of crap, part of the reason I left in the first place, but this, along with 11 other reported deaths from the SAME THING makes me want to do something rash.

I think I need a cigarette...

A fall and then 18 miles

Today began as any good day off. You don't wake up to an alarm and you get a good breakfast in you. Then you go for a ride.

But all was not perfect, as I learned early on. It started with the frustration of trying to install a bike computer on my road bike. After watching an internet tutorial I had to cut off and reset the cabling twice. When I got it outside I thought "hey, this computer seems off" as I began the ride. Unfortunately I decided to mess with the computer after clipping into my pedals and ended up dumping my bike and me landing on my knee. Man that smarted.

But this did not deter me, no sir. A little blood letting never hurt no one and, after shaking off the initial pain I proceeded to ride to the lakes.

One of the best parts about a long run like today was that it gives one time to take in the scenery and think about nothing but riding. I saw some interesting things along the way: A junior high choir singing in the Lake Harriet Bandshell, the exposed trolley tracks on Xerxes Avenue, a sunbather surfing the internet. All good stuff, really.

All in all I had a pretty good day. I even did some fun shopping, which I don't usually do. Most times I just buy groceries or a cup of coffee (pretty lame) but today I bought some fun stuff that will add to future enjoyment in my life.

I forget that you really don't have to be "complete" if you don't want to be. Completeness is merely a short stop on the road of experience where you forget that the road is not over just because you reach a set destination. There is always something else to look forward to. Who would have thought I would fall in love with cycling at 33? I for one didn't.

Peace.

My back hurts

Has your back ever started hurting for what appears to be no reason? I must be stressing out because, with the day I had, I got some serious pain going on.

It started by getting up an hour before my alarm went off. I hate that, especially since I don't want to be up any earlier. Then I got the bright idea to jump on my bike and ride to work. When I drive to work I never get a good spot to park so I end up walking. If I bike I get a primo spot.

However, due to the negligent actions of someone somewhere not paying attention, my rear tire blew out two blocks from work...

Do you know how much fun it is walking a bike for over a mile? Awesome!!! Especially when it starts raining...

I didn't make crap during my shift, worrying about how much this tire was going to cost me, and needing to leave early to fix it.

The rest of the day wasn't so bad, just sweaty and raining while walking home.

Now my back hurts.

'Night.

Be afraid of the biker shorts!

Today I went out for a ride. I told myself, last night, that I was going to go for a ride in the morning. Understandably I was tired from working the night prior but I was determined to do it. I had all the gear ready... accept for the shorts.

I bought a pair of cycling shorts when I got my other clothing. But today was colder and, well, I am not the most slender of people. I have nice legs but, after trying the things on, I decided against it.

But I did wear my biking cleats. I was nervous about getting the shoe clips, hearing about dropping ones bike on themselves and all but it went smashing. I used to sell the things, for crying out loud! I knew how to put them on and take them off so it wasn't a challenge. Not even the first time I had to stop and get out of the clip.

I did about 4-5 miles, I wasn't counting. I just rode until I got to a comfortable distance and then turned around. It was therapeutic, to say the least. I recommend it to everyone, since gas is going supernova.

See you on the trails!

Peace.

The Server's Advocate: Can I get some?

Tonight I went to work. Mother's Day, of all the days there are. The one day moms get a meal or some stupid treatment. I helped out in the yard. Mom appreciated it.

But, at work, it was utter chaos. Fucking people everywhere, moms and their families eating our fine, fine food. I don't blame 'em but it was just a pain in my ass.

Let me explain: I work a double on Fridays, a late shift on Saturday and then Sunday night. My week is far from over but the hump is Sunday nights. This night, unless last Sunday which was downright depressingly slow, was busy as hell. Unfortunately, for me, it was kinda slow. Sure, busier than most Sunday nights but no easier. Two things didn't help me much.

The first was one of my tables sitting for a couple of hours. Didn't order right away, didn't leave right away. This sucks because a server likes to "turn and burn." Not on this table. Lost about $150 in sales from them not moving. And, of course, they only left 15 percent. Oh, if they only knew...

The second was my party of eight: My first one. Two families, combined at one table, decided that, after they got their bill, which has a standard gratuity, they didn't like it. Now, if you eat $100 worth of food in a restaurant you should realize a server worked to earn your gratuity. Did this table appreciate it? Not at all. The manager, who is supposed to support me and my fellow co-workers, actually took the gratuity off the table, thus leaving it up to the eaters to pick what they wanted to leave. And what did they leave me for all my effort? $6... Total. Not $6 for each $50 tab but $3 from each person.

Half the reason I work where I work is to avoid the cheap ass holes that would come in and eat, gripe and not leave anything. I had plenty of that at Applebee's seven years ago. Now I work in a mall that caters to the spoon-feds and kept people of lovely Edina. People who come to my mall have money and lots of it. They drive Mercedes and other fancy imports. They wear $100 jeans and $5,000 watches. They know how to make money and how to spend it.

Most people who eat at my restaurant know that a server is doing all the work for them aside from eating the food. They realize that, when they ask for something, they get it, and quickly. But to crap all over a server because either you don't know better or because you are cheap, then you might as well stay home. Eating out is for those with money, not a right.

Truth be told, I have come to expect a degree of respect from my tables. I am quick and efficient. I rarely make mistakes and rarely take a long time to do anything for people. That is why I usually get good tips.

My managers seem to have forgotten that they were once in my shoes. Instead they cater to the big picture: The machine. They prefer the machine over the gears. But good gears, when they are gone, can make a well-oiled machine squeak. I'm not saying I am abandoning ship anytime soon (I wish!). No, I just don't think I can stand for this much longer. I think it might be time for some changes. One server suggested that we tell the party that there will be a gratuity before they seat them. If we make that a standard, then they don't get to question it.

I'm done bitching. Got to sleep... Peace.